


The Beauty After the Cold

by YourFavLocalMeme



Category: Carry On - Rainbow Rowell
Genre: M/M, Simon Snow - Freeform, mlm, spring fic
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-05-18
Updated: 2018-05-18
Packaged: 2019-05-08 17:23:25
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,623
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/14698872
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/YourFavLocalMeme/pseuds/YourFavLocalMeme
Summary: A Carry On AU for the Snowbaz Spring Extravaganza 2018 in which Natasha Grimm-Pitch is alive, Simon meets her for Spring Tea for the first time since Simon and Baz started dating, and a few kisses are exchanged.





	The Beauty After the Cold

**Author's Note:**

> First of all, I'd like to thank Simon (aka simon—speaks on Tumblr) for helping to beta this fic. Your comments were extremely helpful and appreciated. I apologize if I didn't give you enough time to proofread. Anyways, enjoy the fic.

Every year, Natasha Grimm-Pitch, the headmistress of Watford Boarding School, held an event at the beginning of the Spring where students and professors gathered to drink tea. It wasn’t obligatory, but this year Simon Snow had to go because he was dating her son, Baz Pitch. 

He felt nervous as he adjusted his tie in the mirror. He had met Baz’s mum before, obviously, but it had never been since they started dating. They had been together for a little over a month now, but Baz argued his mother was busy taking care of the school, and that this would be the best time to formally meet her. Simon agreed, but he couldn’t help fearing that Baz was just scared that his mom wouldn’t like him. _He_ couldn’t help fearing that the Headmistress wouldn’t like him.  


For the first half of their lives, Baz and Simon had hated each other. They were roommates, and both seemed to fear the worst of each other. They played cruel pranks on each other and sometimes even screamed at each other until their voices went hoarse. Simon didn’t doubt that Mrs. Grimm-Pitch knew of the worst of their fights, and that for the earlier years, she hadn’t been too fond of him. But Simon hoped, prayed, that he could change that.  


He didn’t know why he cared what Baz’s mum thought of him. But he’d never had to properly introduce himself to the parents of his significant other. With his ex-girlfriend Agatha, he had known her parents far before they started dating. But this… This was different, for a reason he couldn’t put his finger on. He wanted to impress Headmistress Pitch, because he cared about her son and he wanted her to see that.  


Just at that moment, as if knowing what he was thinking about, Baz walked into their room, wearing a suit and tie. Simon couldn’t help but admit that Baz looked good, way better than himself. Last year, he would recoiled at the thought, but at this point, he was used to admiring the way Baz looked.  


“Are you ready to go?” Baz asked, straightening his own tie.  


“I think so,” Simon replied.  


So, they walked out of their room together and went down to the cafeteria. When he saw the woman standing in the center of the room, he froze. He’d seen Headmistress Pitch before, but this wasn’t the same. This time, they weren’t entirely on enemy lines. But the weirdest part about this time was now he was dating her son. Of course, he’d noticed the striking resemblance between the two before. But this time… he took a moment to let it really sink in. They both had the same black hair and the same grey eyes that looked blue or green depending on the way the light reflected them. And they both had the same skin color. It was obvious she was his mother.  


Simon almost went over to chat with her, but Baz stopped him.  


“She’s talking to the professors.” Baz whispered.  


Simon felt a sense of awkwardness take over his body. He didn’t know where to put his hands, and he didn’t know whether they should walk over to one of the tables that had been set up or if he should keep standing with Baz. He wanted to go over and grab a sour cherry scone, his favorite, but he refrained.  


He wished his best friend Penny were there. When he’d asked her, she’d simply shook her head. The Bunces hated the Pitch family, and Penelope refused to put that behind her even though she could be supporting her best friend. So Simon was forced to go with only his boyfriend. He would have asked Agatha, but he didn’t imagine that would go over well. At the end of their last school year, he’d caught Agatha and Baz holding hands in the woods. It turned out Baz had just been doing it to anger him, but it was still the main thing that had led to his break-up with Agatha. Not that he was bitter though. It had all worked out in the end.  


They ended up just sitting down at the tables. Simon couldn’t help but fear that he was the reason Baz hadn’t approached his mother yet. They’d never discussed it, but Simon couldn’t stop himself from being scared that Baz was embarrassed of him; Simon knew the Pitch family wasn’t entirely fond of him. He was an orphan, but his adoptive father was Davy, the man who constantly argued that less-privileged people should be allowed into Watford. He had had to beg to get Simon into the school, yet no other reforms had occurred because of his protests. Simon knew that the Grimm-Pitches weren’t entirely fond of Davy. To be quite honest, he wasn’t entirely either. But they didn’t know that.  


“I’m going to go get some scones,” Simon informed Baz. He got up from his chair and went to the center of the room, where the scones were placed with containers of tea for refills. When he saw who was at the exact place he was headed, he almost stopped himself out of habit. But he kept moving. If he wanted to make a difference in the way their families acted, he had to do something.  


“Headmistress Pitch,” Simon greeted her.  


“Simon Snow. How lovely to see you here today,” Natasha remarked.  


“Headmistress, I know there have been some misunderstandings between us in the past. But I think it would be good for all of us if we started anew.”  


She nodded, but he could see her face tense up. He wondered if he’d offended her, but then she smiled and turned towards him. “You know what, Simon, I agree. Things are changing, and maybe we should change with them.”  


He put some scones on his plate and began to turn around, but she stopped him before he could go.  


“Listen. I know Basilton might not always be the most pleasant person to deal with, and I know he isn’t always the best at showing his emotions. But he cares about you, he does. I wish you two the best.”  


“Thank you, Headmistress.”  


She scoffed. “Please, call me Natasha.”  


“Thank you, Natasha.”  


_Well, that went better than expected._ Simon thought, returning to the table.  


“What happened?” Baz asked, curiously looking up from his tea. Simon knew he’d been watching them, but he didn’t mind. Baz was nervous, an emotion he saw on him once in a blue moon. But he was nervous too, and he understood.  


“We talked. It went a lot better than I expected. I don’t think she necessarily hates me. Davy might be another story though.”  


Baz scoffed. “I think everyone hates Davy, including you, so that shouldn’t be a problem.”  


“Pretty much,” Simon agreed.  


Simon buttered his scones, watching as Baz rolled his eyes.  


“How many of those do you eat in a day?”  


“Probably about six.”  


Baz laughed, but it wasn’t sarcastic for once, it was warm, and almost happy. Simon’s heart melted. Sarcastic Baz was great, although sometimes frustrating, but seeing Baz genuinely happy was his favorite thing in the world. He knew Baz had been through a lot in his life, and he knew that for years Baz had pined over him with no hope of anything coming out of it, but he seemed genuinely happy now, and that made Simon soft.  
“Snow, you’re going to get fat if you continue eating at that rate.”  


“I’ve been doing it for most of my life and I’m fine.”  


And then, at that moment, the most wonderful thing in the world happened. Natasha Grimm-Pitch herself came over to their table and sat down.  


“Basilton, did you take books out of my room again without permission?” She asked.  


“I… might have.”  


“Next time, please ask,” she chided.  


Baz nodded.  


“Mother, this…” he gestured to me. “This is my boyfriend, Simon Snow. I believe you’ve met, on worse circumstances and maybe a few better.”  
“I know. Simon, it’s lovely to meet you, again.”  


“You as well, Natasha.”  


She looked outside, where the sun was shining brightly on them. A rainbow glowed outside. It had been pouring rain the previous hour, but now it was sunny and bright. “Lovely to see that the weather has cleared up.”  


Simon agreed, nodding. “It is.”  


Natasha sighed. “I just love the spring-time. It’s the beauty after the cold.”  


Simon saw that there was something deeper to what she was saying, and he found he agreed. After years of fighting, it was lovely to not be fighting anymore. It was lovely to finally see the light at the end of the tunnel. It was amazing to see that maybe hate could turn into something so much more, or that maybe it was never truly hate after all. It was enlightening to know that things would get better, that misery never lasted forever.  


Baz went up to get more tea, and Simon was alone with Natasha yet again, but this time he wasn’t scared. Maybe they could move on from all of the things that had happened years again. Maybe Natasha could grow to see him as a second son. But maybe she didn’t even need time. He marveled at how easily she could forgive him for all of the years they hadn’t gotten along. It had taken him a long time to get over the fact that prior to this year, Simon and Baz had been sworn-enemies.  


“Why did you forgive me?” He asked, genuinely curious.  


“Simon, there was nothing to forgive. You were both two boys whose families hated each other and who knew no better than to hate each other as well. And you did no wrong.”  


She paused. “Plus, I’ve seen the way he looks at you. I’ve heard the way his voice changes whenever he talks about you. He loves you. And I suspect you feel the same.”  


She was right, and he knew it, deep in his bones. It was something he’d been thinking about for quite a while, something he had probably felt for years before. It was something he’d never allowed himself to give much thought to, because how could he love his sworn-enemy? But they weren’t enemies anymore. Things were changing. Maybe it was time to accept that he was allowed to feel the way he felt, that feeling something much stronger than hate for Baz was not wrong, or something to be ashamed of.  


When Baz returned, Natasha stood up, kissing him on the cheek. She whispered something in his ear and was off.  


“What did she say?” Simon asked, curiosity getting the better of him.  


“Nothing. What did she say to you?” Baz asked.  


“Nothing. Don’t worry about it,” Simon responded defensively. There were still moments like this between them, when it felt like Simon couldn’t break down Baz’s walls, or like they were back in the times before this. Maybe they would always be at least a little scared of their feelings for each other, a little nervous that the other couldn’t possibly feel the same. But it would get better, with time. It had to. They would carry on. They would carry on because you couldn’t walk backwards, only forwards.  


Baz breathed out, as if he was going to say something. “Do you… Do you want to get away from this for a while?”  


“Sure, where do you want to go?” Simon asked.  


“There’s a garden outside, a little field that the sun hits perfectly. I thought we could go out there.”  


“Are you sure we’re allowed?”  


“Snow, my mother is the Headmistress of this school. I think it’s fine.”  


“Okay,” Simon nodded.  


So they walked outside, hesitantly holding each other’s hands. Baz’s were usually cold, but Simon didn’t mind. In fact, he’d gotten used to it, used to the cold. Often times, he found he liked it.  


When they stopped walking, they were in a field of grass. It was beautiful. The sun shined down on them, the rainbow still gleaming in the distant sky. The sky was bright blue, showing that the storm had passed and was long gone. In fact, the only remnants of the previous storm was the rainbow that remained.  


They laid down. Simon didn’t know what to do with his body, but Baz hesitantly wrapped his arm around him, and so he nuzzled into his neck.  
“So… It’s spring.” Simon announced.  


Baz looked like he wanted to say a snarky remark, but he held back. Instead, he traced the moles on Simon’s neck.  


“Your mum seems to like me. I don’t know why, or how, but she does.”  


“She loves you. I think she always has, somehow. I think she saw that I was smitten way before I did.”  


“You know, she told me you cared about me, that you loved me.”  


Baz was silent for a while, continuing to trace the moles on Simon’s neck.  


“I’m… I’m not good with this, you know. This talking thing, this meeting your mum thing.” Simon admitted.  


“I know. I’m not either.”  


“That’s a lie. You always seem so confident, so sure of yourself.”  


“I’m not. Sometimes, I think I hide behind a facade so much that no one really sees me.” His voice went quiet.  


“I see you. I could be wrong, maybe we can never truly know someone, but I see you, and I don’t hate what I see. I mean, you’re intelligent, you’re sarcastic, you’re funny, and sometimes you can actually be really sweet. You’re my favorite person in the whole world, next to Penny, of course.”  
Baz was quiet for a while, as if he was lost in thought. Simon saw it, saw him going into that dark place again, and he wanted to stop it. He needed to stop it. He wanted Baz to see what he saw, how brilliant he was, how beautiful, how funny he was.  


Simon took a deep breath. He knew what he needed to say, and he knew that he’d needed to get it off his chest for a while. “You drive me crazy sometimes, you know that? You’re so hard to read, and sometimes I hate all the effort I go through to try to read you, but it’s worth it in the end. It’s worth it because getting to you know you was the best thing I ever did, in my entire life. And my life was a massive mess up, but getting to know you, that’s one of the few things I did right. And Baz, I think I might love you. I think I’ve loved you for a long time, but now we’re not hiding what we feel anymore, and I love you, I do.” He inhaled. He’d never said that much, not to anyone, and it was the scariest thing he’d ever done, but he didn’t regret it. He looked at Baz, scared he was going to yell at him, to tell him that he was wrong, that he couldn’t possibly love him.  


But instead, Baz sighed, and said. “I think I love you too. I think I always have, quite honestly.” That’s all he said, and then he sighed yet again. “I don’t even know how to tell you how much I love you. Wow…”  


Simon contemplated what he was about to say next, but then he said it. “So don’t tell me. Show me.”  


And so he kissed him, and the rainbow shone above. Simon realized that Natasha was right, that this was the beauty after the cold.  


They went home to their apartment that night, repeating the words quietly through out the night.  


_I love you. I love you. I love you._


End file.
